We may only be two dinner parties into Married At First Sight 2025, but this season has already lived up to its promise of drama, drama, and more drama. As someone who’s watched MAFS year after year, it would be difficult to deny that without the chaos of commitment ceremonies and awkward challenges, my well-established expectations of MAFS wouldn’t be served. But what happens when this drama, which panders to the needs of reality TV fans like myself, comes at the cost of how cast members are treated by their co-stars?
From mental health and body image, to sex and identity, MAFS strives to hold a mirror up to society, forcing us to reflect on our own views and the role these issues play in society at large. In being consistent with this, the show reveals the unfortunately rampant misogyny that exists in the real world. I wish it didn’t (for the sake of those women on TV), but it does – every season! In the first two weeks of the show, we’ve already seen male cast members making derogatory remarks about women. We’ve witnessed instances of gaslighting, body-shaming and cheating, and one groom even disrespectfully divulging details about his wife and their sex life.
Whether you watch Married At First Sight or not, I think you’d probably agree that the moments from the show that I’ve rounded up below expose some very disappointing behaviour towards women.
Ryan Donnelly says Jacqueline Burfoot has ‘crazy eyes’
And wait for it, there’s more! During the men’s workshop with sexologist Alessandra Rampolla for Intimacy Week, Ryan decided to say a bit too much, in my opinion, when asked about how he and his wife’s sex life is. After criticising Jacqui’s fantasy date she’d organised the night before, Ryan went on to claim she has “crazy” eyes, before telling the rest of his male co-stars that his wife is good at oral sex, but trust me, not in a nice way at all.
I’m relieved to tell you, most of the other grooms were far from impressed and shared Ryan’s remarks with their wives. They then went on to confront Ryan at the most recent dinner party, and well, watching it back on TV now, he says he’s sorry for his words. Hindsight’s a beautiful thing, isn’t it?
“It was crude and ungentlemanly and I look back and just think back like ‘Oh God’. I do regret it,’” Ryan told 9Now.
Also appearing on Today Extra, he said, “I’d like to take this opportunity to apologise to the viewers, to Jacqui, to anyone who was offended by it, to Alessandra who was present in the room…”
Jake Luik’s multiple insults in the photo ranking challenge
There’s always a rebel in the group, and Jake’s achieved that status within a fortnight, by leaving the show early – which is against the rules. But it kind of makes sense, considering his wife, and pretty much everyone else, had no more time for him. No one was having a bar of his excuses after he made disrespectful comments about several women during the photo ranking challenge.
The challenge asks cast members to rank their co-stars of the opposite sex according to attractiveness. They have to be ‘honest’. But that doesn’t mean you have to say everything on your mind, Jake.
In just a few minutes, he managed to say Jacqui had “crazy eyes” (that’s where Ryan admits he got the idea from) and that Sierah looked like she could “stab you in your sleep”. He also raised eyebrows when he commented on New Zealand-born Awhina Rutene’s ethnicity.
“Not gonna sound like… I’m not racist or nothing but I do like Caucasian people mainly, mostly,” he told his wife, Ashleigh.
“Awhina she’s not exactly like – she’s Māori I think – probably why she’s not a bit higher. Just because, like… the physical features.”
As a woman of colour, I could write a rage-filled essay right now. But I won’t… I think you get the picture.
Adrian Araouzou’s concerning ‘dad’ comments, plus he seemingly cheats on Awhina Rutene
It’s so painful to watch Awhina and Adrian’s relationship on the show. I just wish I could reach into the TV screen and pluck Awhina out of there, merely to save her from Adrian stringing her along. Just after they got married, Adrian was quick to tell Awhina that it wasn’t ideal that she was a single mum as he always wanted to “have that first with someone”. And wait for it, he then told her on their honeymoon that he wouldn’t be able to love a partner’s child from a previous relationship as much as ‘his own’.
“If I’m being 100% honest, if I know me, I don’t know if I can love my kids as much as your kid. I don’t know if I could love them [all equally],” he said.
OK, red flags right there! But given the sacrifices she’s made to come on the show, plus her intense physical attraction to Adrian, Awhina decided to stay on MAFS and has since been trying to work through this core difference.
When the pair watched Adrian’s audition video, Awhina was disheartened that Adrian had said he wasn’t ready to be a dad.
“I never said I wasn’t ready to be a dad. I didn’t say I wanted to be someone else’s dad,” he then explained to Awhina.
That’s not doing yourself any favours buddy. That’s not what your wife – who already has a kid – wants to hear.
“Because I am a mum, you’re not actually open to even letting me in, really,” she responded. “The language you’re using now is very definite, final…
“Why are you still here?” she added. “Because you don’t want someone with children.”
Fast forward to dinner party number two, and the cameras zoomed in on Adrian and castmate Sierrah Swepstone playing footsies under the table. Adrian has since told the Daily Mail that it wasn’t cheating, saying, “Look, if bumping feet under a crowded dinner table is cheating, then half the cast must be guilty. It’s ridiculous.”
I’m not convinced. I have two words for Awhina: get out!
Tim Gromie lies after audition video and gaslights Katie Johnstone at dinner party
Just moments after he got married, Tim took producers aside (as we saw on-screen) to say Katie wasn’t the type of woman he’d asked for.
“Totally not what I wanted. Not good,’ Tim said. “I normally go for short, petite, blonde or brunette. Katie’s nothing like what I usually go for. There’s just no attraction. I can tell straight away.”
Tim later told Katie off-camera that he didn’t feel a ‘spark’ between them and didn’t see the point of continuing the relationship.
“I think ‘sparks’ is just a cop-out for saying I’m not attracted to you,” Katie told him in another scene that the camera captured. This was all after Katie had continuously been trying to make the relationship work.
Then, two things happened:
Katie watched Tim’s audition tape in which he said: “I’m not Brad Pitt, I’m not expecting Miranda Kerr.” He also said he’d “give it a go” even if there was no spark to begin with on his wedding day.
Then, he told the rest of the cast at the dinner party that he was the one making all of the effort in the relationship. When some of the other women jumped to Katie’s defence, Tim realised his gaslighting wasn’t going to work, and ended up storming out of the dinner party. Well, cheers to that!