Content warning: This article discusses domestic violence
Across two warm days at the end of October, over 170 people joined me at dining and entertainment venue and community club, Mounties in Western Sydney. In the crowd sat the Hon Jodie Harrison, NSW Minister for Women, Seniors and the Prevention Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault, Hannah Tonkin, NSW Women’s Safety Commissioner, Moo Baulch, Chair of Our Watch and 160 club managers. And we were all there with one thing on our mind: How could we work together to build a safer community?
I’ve experienced domestic violence first hand and am incredibly passionate about putting a stop to stats according to Our Watch, such as, “on average, one woman is killed every nine days by a current or former partner” and “1 in 4 women has experienced violence, emotional abuse, or economic abuse by a cohabitating partner since the age of 15”. None of these numbers are okay.
Here’s my own statistic: It took me 16 years to leave my abusive partner. My experience included financial, physical and emotional abuse. I would have my paycheque rationed so I had enough to live off, but not enough to escape. I would be spit on, have cigarette ash dropped on me, be shaken while being told I was ugly, worthless, unlovable. Of course, those rhetorics are hard to listen to when you’re ‘in’ it, but they’re also hard to forget once you’ve left – if you hear something often enough, you believe it.
It took two ladies at the Club I worked at to recognise, empathise and then support me to leave my abusive situation outside of work. The details and timelines are a lot longer than that, of course, but the key is support – and that’s why I took a year off from my role as Venue Manager at Mounties Group to learn from Insight Exchange, that supports people with lived experience of domestic, family and sexualised violence, on how to inform and strengthen social, service and systemic response, and then bring those learnings back to the Club Industry. Domestic violence needed an uprising and the Club Industry has the perfect platform to reach and educate many, with over 13 million members, 140,000 employees and 6,500 clubs across Australia.
With the support of Mounties Group, I developed and led the first DV Action Plan across the industry, supported the creation of The Club Industry Domestic Violence Prevention Committee, aimed to raise awareness and educate around domestic, family and sexualised violence in Australia. In late October we launched our ‘Building A Safer Community, Club Training Program’. Everyone in the room came to learn from our education program, so they could take it back to their communities. Topics at the session were derived from those that supported my own lived experience, such as how we can recognise and respond to people who use violence, how to support those experiencing violence, how to offer support to your colleagues who are supporting others, and – perhaps the most important – reiterating to victim-survivors that we’re not alone.
With NSW and Federal Government Plans in primary prevention strategies already underway for domestic violence, we have hope for a brighter future. But it’s also up to independent uprisings – individuals like those in our Committee – to say ‘enough is enough’ and turn adversity into action.
For more information: https://www.mountiesgroup.com.au/domestic-family-violence-support
If you or anyone you know is affected by domestic, family or sexual violence and needs support, please call 1800 RESPECT. Support is also available on Kids Helpline (1800 55 1800) and No To Violence (1300 766 491).
About the author: Arely Carrion is the Executive Manager of Community at Mounties Group, victim-survivor advocate, board member of a range organisations that support women experiencing domestic, family or sexualised violence (DFSV), and mum of two adult twins.